On my own and all alone
I will never forget the day. I stood in the middle of a parking lot isolated by a vast world of uncertainty. Through a blur of tears, I watched as the last 18 years of security, comfort and guidance drove out of my life and into its own familiarity – without me. My parents were gone now. I was on my own with countless opportunities at my fingertips. There I stood … ready to conquer the world as a college freshman, but paralyzed by fear of the unknown. Little did I know what was in store during the next four years. My freshman fears are echoed in the words of Jeff Schadt, founder and executive director of the Youth Transition Network (YTN): “They have left me completely alone without a shepherd in a hostile environment.” That’s what many seniors feel like as they try to transition from high school to college. “This is the first transition where all … is stripped away, and they need to be loved and accepted and fit in,” Schadt explained. In their quest for love, they get sucked down roads that lead them to being beaten, bruised and hurt. Why? Because they are searching for something they always thought they had – truth. Sadly, what many church-going teens take from their youth group experience is nothing more than a misunderstood Gospel, which explains why they fall away from their “faith” during college. According to a 2007 study from LifeWay Research, 70% of the people 23 to 30 years old are nowhere to be found in church on a regular basis for at least a year between the ages of 18 and 22. (See AFA Journal, 5/08.) In their formative years their hearts were not transformed by the Gospel because church was meaningless entertainment for the masses. “It’s a confluence of things that have just gone bad – very bad – for the Body of Christ,” Schadt added.
Floundering “Right now, we have about 800,000 kids a year go astray from the church,” Schadt explained. He said some parents excuse the seriousness of their children’s church departure by rationalizing, “Well, aren’t the kids going to go wild no matter what we do? Once they go wild, then they’ll come back to the Lord, and they’ll be stronger for it.” But Schadt said he doesn’t see that in Scripture. He put it this way: “When I look at Timothy, I don’t see Paul saying, ‘Timothy, you’re 19. You don’t know enough to be a pastor. Go take a walk on the wild side so you can learn and then come back and then you’ll be a better pastor because of it.’ “What parents … and churches need to stop and realize is it’s [during] this four-year period where these kids are going to select their lifestyles and careers, and a lot of them are going to select their spouses.” Doing so apart from the Lord has lifetime consequences. While about two-thirds of the runaways do return to church at some level in their 30s, many come back with non-Christian spouses. “I’m wondering if this issue isn’t why we have such a high divorce rate in the church,” he added. Therefore, Schadt said it’s so important to pay attention to the spiritual transition of the student, in addition to the physical transition. Students will make some of life’s most vital decisions during their college years, so parents need to have prepared them, early on, to make wise choices. Effective and healthy lifestyle choices must be made from the internal motivation to be right before the Lord, rather than the external motivation to please parents. While recognizing the importance for parents and churches to ground their young people in real Gospel teaching, organizations such as the YTN are working to decrease the dramatic loss from the church by guiding parents, youth pastors, college ministers and students during this transitional period.
(Source: OneNewsNow.com)
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